Friday, February 26, 2010


I am sitting in my den. There is no TV on. There are no children awake. The husband is in bed. It is quiet. Weird. I have not experienced this in a very long time. I really have nothing else to say. I guess I will be quiet now.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Spencer says:

Spencer loves to talk, A LOT. Yes, I know what you all are thinking, "Really? You have child that likes to talk? I would've never guessed." Are you all done with your sarcastic thoughts? Good, let's move on. I figure I might as well post Spencerisms every once in a while.

Before you read on, I must warn you, I very rarely censor myself. This means I write without thought for delicate sensibilities. This is not the blog for you if you're offended by occasional potty humor or crassness. I'm not saying that I'll be dropping "F-bombs" or talking about bodily functions constantly, I'm just saying it's going to happen sometimes and probably without warning or apology. Stop shaking your head Mama.

Here are a few Spencerisms. They are short and sweet.
"I run fast because I have a penis." I had no idea. I really would have thought this would be a hinderance, aerodynamically speaking.

"That is surprise!" Spencer's definition of "surprise" is "awesome", so next time you see something awesome think of Spencer and say, "That is so surprise." All the cool almost 4 year olds are saying it.

Monday, February 15, 2010

I love my boys.

I have two sons. One is 6; one is almost 4. One has autism; one does not. One is Xander; one is Spencer. They are polar opposites.

Xander is the 6 year old with autism. He is painfully sweet. There is something about him that makes me hold my breath. I have an overwhelming need to protect him. Everyone who meets him seems to catch this same desire. He is beautiful, tall with big, staring brown eyes and a mop of blond curls that beg to be touched. His autism gives him an innocence and honesty that isn't present in other children his age. When he laughs, he is happy; when he cries, he is sad or hurt; when he yells, he is angry. I never have to guess; it's always there in his face or actions. He is my cuddler.

SpencerSpencer, obviously, is the soon to be 4 year old. He is also very sweet; however, he is also VERY mischievous. He is smarter than me, much smarter. I have to remind myself that he is 4. I also feel the need to protect him, most often from himself. He is also beautiful and tall. There is no name for the color of his eyes. They are blue and/or green and/or gray and/or golden. Sometimes they are all four. His hair is blond and uncontrollable, often like him. He is charming and loves everyone he meets. He has no preconceptions other than the expectation that you will love him as much as he loves you. He is quick to show you his "cool tricks". He is my entertainer.

Xander and Spencer are typical brothers. They play, they laugh, they fight. Xander is usually the one on the receiving end. This is good because Spencer forces Xander to stand-up for himself. Having Spencer is the best thing we ever did for Xander. Had Xander been diagnosed before we got pregnant with Spencer, there would have been no Spencer. What a tragedy that would have been for all of us. He makes Xander play with him; he requires Xander to engage with him; he does not allow Xander to withdraw. Spencer, in many ways, is Xander's biggest advocate without even trying.

I love my boys.